


Saving Expertise

by minkhollow



Category: Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog, Iron Man (2008)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crossover, Gen, Horrible Awards nominee, Horrible Awards winner
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-02-06
Updated: 2009-02-17
Packaged: 2017-10-02 05:23:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 11,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minkhollow/pseuds/minkhollow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Captain Hammer's day-saving is interrupted by a smartass with a flying suit of armor - which naturally means the third party is a villain, right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Veers off Dr. Horrible canon near the beginning of "A Man's Gotta Do."  
> My thanks to the awesome people at Horrible Awards on LJ! This won Best WIP honors in round 1 (despite... not being a WIP anymore a few days after nominations closed).  
> I'm not Joss Whedon, and I'm not Marvel. I'm just borrowing because it needed to happen.

Captain Hammer smashes in the nefarious hijacking device on top of the van, then jumps off, seeing a chance to remind his adoring public that he's there to protect them from certain doom. He barely registers the van crunching against something until the person responsible for it interrupts him.

"Okay, first off, it looks like whoever was responsible for steering the van had it under control, and second, do you _have_ to sing about it?"

"Ah. Iron Man." Captain Hammer crosses his arms, doing his best - which is damn good - to look unimpressed by the red and gold suit of armor. "You might know a lot about dramatic appearances, but it seems your so-called 'heroics' leave a lot to be desired."

"Says the man who can't be bothered to make sure bystanders remain that way."

"Psh. _By_standers. They're only standing by to see my thrilling heroics. It's the damage done by villains like yourself that puts them in danger."

Iron Man's mask is fairly static, but the tone of his voice still gives the impression of a raised eyebrow. "Villain? Me? All I do is blow up terrorists."

"Your good publicity might have the press fooled, but I can see right through your act. Anything with that much science--" he waves a hand at the suit - "can't really be _that_ good."

Captain Hammer's distracted by a flash of white in his peripheral vision; in turning to deal with Dr. Horrible's appearance, he misses Iron Man stepping up behind him - until he's hit on the head with enough force to take even Captain Hammer down.

***

Dr. Horrible pauses by the van, when Captain Hammer crumples. He's not one to call Iron Man a villain, which makes this turn of events all the more surprising.

"That's better," Iron Man says. "Was that your steering gadget?"

Dr. Horrible manages to nod.

"Nice work, from what I saw."

"Thanks. It was fine before the friendly neighborhood Corporate Tool smashed it in..." He opens the back of the van, since its driver seems to have deserted the area; when he turns around, he finds that Iron Man's deemed the area quiet enough to lift his visor.

"...I _knew_ it. I knew it! When you have a new toy, you tell the whole world. You don't _joke_ about it."

Tony Stark smirks. "I get that a lot. We should talk, but this isn't the best of places - how about you come by my house this weekend?"

"...Seriously?"

"You think this is the sort of thing I'd joke about?"

"Well, no." Dr. Horrible smiles. "Thanks."

"No problem. And leave the van be - if it's Wonderflonium you're after, I can get you some."

That's even more of a shock; it must be clear from his face, because Tony adds, "Hey, anyone who doesn't get along with this asshole can't be all bad."


	2. Chapter 2

Tony Stark's house isn't difficult to find, Billy will grant that. It's also nearly too impressive for words, and in normal circumstances, he'd be feeling way too outclassed to even approach the place.

But since Tony Stark is the guy who bashed Captain Hammer's head in the other day (even if Captain Hammer reportedly got up and walked away ten minutes later), these are far from normal circumstances. He takes a moment before getting out of the car to steel his nerve, then goes to the front door and rings the doorbell.

He's not sure what he was expecting, but it definitely wasn't a panel of blue lights coming on and a refined British voice with a decent dose of 'disembodied' saying, _"Good afternoon. How may I help you?"_

"...Um. Hi. Mr. Stark wanted to talk to me? If you tell him it's the guy Captain Hammer was bothering, he should know."

_"Very well. One moment, sir."_ The time that actually passes before the voice comes back is way too short for an actual person to run around a house this big; Billy's thinking it's probably a damn sophisticated computer, knowing who owns the place.

_"He'll be upstairs in a moment. In the meantime, come in."_ The door doesn't open by itself, which is almost disappointing, but he does hear it unlock.

"Thanks," he says, opening the door and trying not to go bug-eyed at the inside of the place. He'd expected extravagant - this is, after all, a billionaire's house - but expecting it and seeing it are working out to be a little bit different.

The hole in the floor, straight through an alcove that looks big enough for a grand piano, is a little incongruous, but given the suit, Billy can guess how it got there.

Before too long, Tony does come up the stairs, wiping his hands on a rag. "Good, you made it. And it seems you've already met Jarvis."

"If that's your..." Billy makes a vague gesture, that happens to take in a control panel with the same blue lights from outside on it.

"He runs the house. Programming's gotten a little more complex than I originally expected, but these things happen. So, what do I call you when you're not in the lab coat?"

"Billy. Matthews."

"Nice to actually meet you." Tony grins. "Come on downstairs, let's talk."

Of course, when they reach the garage, Billy needs a good minute or so to really take it all in. He doesn't bother hiding the bug-eyed reaction, this time, since he thinks Tony would be smirking like he'd just put a kid in a candy store anyway.

"...Wow. This is really - hey, that's my controller, isn't it?"

Tony nods. "I'd have asked, but it's not really functional at the moment. Anyway, it looked solid from the air, so I thought I'd take a closer look. How'd you steer it?"

"Wrote up an app for my iPhone. It would've worked just fine, if it hadn't attracted a certain day-saver's attention."

"Yeah, I guessed that. It's a clever idea, but I can think of better ends for it than what you tried. What do you do for a living, anyway?"

"Tech support." Billy rolls his eyes. "Which basically means refilling the copier, since the rest of the office can't seem to remember where we keep the paper, and telling the idiots who call in that if they had the Internet _in_ their computers, a lot of people would be very pissed off."

"...Damn, no wonder you're veering toward the dark side of the Force. Tech support's enough to make anyone crack. That said, you want a job?"

"...What?"

Tony shrugs. "I've been looking for a good, creative engineer for a while now, and as far as I'm concerned, that little doohickey counts as one aced interview."

"You're... not joking."

"I joke about many things. Engineering is not and will never be one of them."

Billy's too stunned to react, for a few moments. He shoves down the protests building in the back of his head - he doesn't have official experience, he didn't even major in engineering when he attempted college, the League application's actually getting a thorough look this time - and tries to focus on the positive elements.

The thought of working for someone who understands the habits of a reclusive tinkerer-genius and that Captain Hammer isn't as much of a hero as he likes to think - not to mention the virtually unlimited funding - pretty well outweighs any obstacles, particularly with experience or lack thereof already declared no object.

"...Okay. I think I'm in."


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wild-signature-hunt line borrowed for a sense of the timing (and because it's awesome); Joss Whedon did it first.

There's something soothing about doing laundry.

Penny thinks Wednesdays became her laundry day because she's usually the most stressed out after work, and the shelter's usually in good enough hands that they don't need her. Doing her laundry helps her unwind and keep her positive outlook; usually, by the time she's got a washer loaded, she's starting to relax, no matter what the day's thrown at her.

Billy comes in about ten minutes after she gets there - not texting, this time. He glances her way and smiles, a little; from what little talking they did last week, she's got the feeling it took a lot for him to do that.

"Hi," she says. "How was your weekend?"

"Oh. Hi. It was... pretty good. What about you - you end up hunting wild signatures the whole time?"

Penny nods. "Pretty much. Apparently, I missed Iron Man by about three blocks. Kind of a shame, that would've been one hell of an endorsement to get."

"Yeah, no kidding. You missed him?"

"So I heard. I think you still would've been in the area, actually. People said it was near where I bumped into you. Something about Iron Man punching out Captain Hammer, too."

Billy looks toward the washers. "He more... sort of just hit him upside the head."

"You _were_ still there? Wow. So what do you think about the hero debate?"

"What hero debate?"

"Well, you know." Penny shrugs. "The press calls both Captain Hammer and Iron Man heroes, but if they don't get along, does that mean we're wrong about someone? And if so, which one's not that heroic?"

"Iron Man's more of a hero," Billy says, almost immediately. "I mean... he at least makes sure the bystanders can get away unscathed, and mostly works in some pretty remote areas anyway. Captain Hammer's so busy making sure people know he's saving their asses that half the time, he puts them in even more danger."

"You're really opinionated on this, aren't you?"

"I've had a while to think about it." He shrugs. "It was interesting to watch, anyway."

"I bet. You do anything else interesting, besides witness a superhero scuffle?"

"Actually, I... got offered a new job. One of those things where I was in the right place at the right time, mostly, but... anything's better than tech support."

Penny smiles. "Good for you. I've... heard pretty much nothing but horror stories, about tech support, so I can see the 'anything's better' argument. But I do hope you actually enjoy what you're moving to."

Billy grins; it's actually kind of charming, especially now that he's relaxed a little. "Oh, I think I will."


	4. Chapter 4

Billy has never seen two weeks pass so slowly as the time between putting in his notice at the tech support office and actually being free of the place. It's like the world knows he's leaving this sphere of work for good, if all goes well, and everyone conspired to empty the copier in record time and at least quadruple the number of stupid questions.

It's enough to convince any sane person that the status definitely needs a little of its quo back. It doesn't help that there's only so much he can do on his side projects, since at this point, it's a little easier to wait for the official supply line to open up. That costs him a couple of solid opportunities to try to stick one to Captain Hammer, but maybe that's just as well; with work being so frustrating, he doesn't need getting his ass handed to him on top of that.

And there are a couple of bright spots. He keeps talking to Penny; they even go see a movie, the Saturday before he starts at Stark. (She calls it a celebration of his freedom from the daily grind of tech support. He's just glad it actually looks like he might have a chance.) He gets the Trans-Matter Ray up to a hundred percent, and starts working on a couple of other ideas, mostly so he's got something to build on when he starts rolling on the new job.

He also throws out a couple of blog posts, since the Dr. Horrible thing has always been good for stress relief. He's a little leery of disclosing all the details of what's going on, even though he knows the League is liable to catch on eventually; he'd rather make sure Tony knows that extra publicity is coming, to say nothing of Tony's personal assistant.

Billy hasn't formally met her yet, but he knows from the news that you keep Pepper Potts in the loop or face her wrath.

In any case, he manages to make it through those two weeks without actually losing his mind, which he figures is a net plus. He figures if all he ends up doing his first day at Stark is filling out paperwork, it'll still be a good day - if nothing else, he's pretty sure he won't have to refill anyone's copier.

On Monday, he does end up filling out paperwork through to lunch. It's only a little tiresome, and after lunch, Tony makes a point of not letting him fill out any more.

"You can get whatever's left tomorrow," he says. "You've already done the part that puts you on the payroll, and I want to talk gadgets for a while."

"Oh. All... right. I don't think I'd protest even if you weren't in charge."

Tony grins. "Being in charge just means I'm _allowed_ to pull you away from the paperwork. Come on, it's shop-talk time."

Tony's office isn't quite as overwhelming as his house was, but it's still pretty damn extravagant. Tony makes a beeline for the alcohol - some kind of scotch, Billy thinks - pours himself a glass, and offers Billy some.

"No thanks. Not my speed - and isn't it a little early for that anyway?"

Tony snorts. "It's never too early, if you know what you're doing. So, gadgets. What all have you done already?"

"...You would ask, the day I wasn't expecting this. I have a few schematics for things at home."

"So wing it. What'd you want the Wonderflonium for, at least?"

"Freeze ray. One that stops time, not like an ice beam." It occurred to Billy, when he got home from the aborted heist, that the load he'd been after would've bounced when the van stopped anyway; it's just as well he never got it home.

From there, he ends up explaining a few of his other projects. Tony likes the sound of the Trans-Matter Ray, and makes comments on a couple of the other ones as best as anyone can without the schematics in front of them, and finally stops Billy about five rays into the conversation.

"I'm picking up a theme here. Other than the ray guns. You're quite the pacifist, for an aspiring villain."

Billy shrugs. "There's nothing creative or elegant about killing people. And there's no point in putting people who aren't involved in the matter at risk."

"I like the way you think. I'm just wondering what the hell got you in Captain Hammer's bad graces in the first place."

"Aside from the fact that he doesn't like science-minded loners and probably would've beaten me to a pulp even if I'd _tried_ calling myself some kind of hero? Before you started up, people who think like him were getting all the good press. If people actually realised self-delusion is his greatest superpower, they wouldn't want to follow his lead."

"True." Tony considers this for a few moments, then adds, "So what the asshole needs is a little truth in advertising. There's gotta be a way to take him down a few pegs without actually killing him - because really, what fun would it be if he didn't learn anything from the experience?"

"We're talking about Captain Hammer. He may not learn anything from it anyway."

"Can't hurt to try, can it? At the very least, it might tarnish his reputation."

Billy smiles, a little. The gears in his head started turning somewhere around 'truth in advertising'; it'd be a tricky idea to pull off, and there's pretty much no margin for error, but that hasn't stopped him from trying things before. "I... think I might have something in mind."

"Awesome. Keep me posted."

From there, they trail off into more mundane sorts of shop talk. But that's all right; it still makes for the best first day on the job he could hope for.


	5. Chapter 5

Tony likes the plan for knocking a little sense into Captain Hammer's head, and even offers to help test it out. Billy's a little skeptical about that, at first, but Tony does have a point; they're only going to get one good shot, whenever they get the chance to use the thing, so it's better that they know how it works beforehand.

And, well. Billy doesn't want to ask Pepper to suffer through it, Colonel Rhodes is an even more terrifying prospect, and... he can't ask Penny. Not without explaining at least a dozen other things. So that leaves himself and Tony, and if Tony's willing, Billy can totally live with that. He still waits until he's pretty sure it's near a hundred percent, though, just in case.

It's designed to last for about half an hour, but they have Jarvis route all calls to voicemail for the whole afternoon, in case it takes a while to wear off. Obviously, it won't matter if Captain Hammer goes around spouting the truth whether he wants to or not, but it'd be a little bad if Tony did that for more than the control audience - which consists of Billy, Jarvis, and Pepper.

It does for the first three minutes, anyway. When Tony starts talking about how many people he's slept with, Pepper decides she's heard more than enough, and heads upstairs to tend to the email backlog, or something. Billy doesn't blame her one bit, but he's got to see it through. It's the only way to make sure they've got an accurate idea of how the thing works.

Forty minutes later, the effects start to wear off. Tony leans back in his chair and sighs. "Finally. That was annoying."

"Well, yes, but do you think it'll get the job done?"

"More than done, I'd say. You do good work."

Billy grins. "Thanks. Now all we need is somewhere we can spring it on him - preferably highly public."

"I think I know something that might work. I'll look into it tomorrow, and we can plan from there."

"Cool. Just let me-- oh shit, is _that_ the time? I gotta - laundry, it's sort of a standing date thing."

"Jesus, take the girl someplace nice," Tony calls, as Billy bolts up the stairs. And he's building up to that - with every passing week, he's getting a little more confident about the idea of asking her on a fully acknowledged date. He's pretty sure she won't laugh at the very idea, anyway.

He just hopes she doesn't ask why he's late getting to the laundromat.

***

Tony looks up the phone number that afternoon, while he's thinking about it, and asks Jarvis to remind him to make the call, if it gets to the next afternoon and it looks like he's forgetting. Nothing's likely to get done until Monday, but it can't hurt to leave a message, while he's still got the idea in his head.

This isn't the sort of call he wants to leave to Pepper, either.

He remembers to make the call on his own, and gets it done before lunch. He's routed to voicemail, as expected, but that's all right.

"Hi, Christine, this is Tony Stark. Call me back tomorrow - I think I might be able to give you the scoop of your life. Call it a thank-you for those photos."


	6. Chapter 6

Billy's a little surprised, when Tony says he called in a reporter - from _Vanity Fair_, no less, so anything that comes of this is going to be pretty far-reaching. The surprise doesn't last long once he finds out they'd talked before.

More than talked, is Billy's guess, since this _is_ Tony Stark. But anyway.

"She's met Captain Jackass before, it turns out," Tony says, as they make sure everything's in position. "Wasn't very impressed by him, and her opinion didn't improve when he said they slept together even after she turned him down. And, well, she tipped me off about a major problem a couple months back, so I figured I kind of owe her one."

"Long as you think she can do this without giving up the game."

"She was the only person at the 'I am Iron Man' press conference who wasn't completely blindsided by me saying so. I think she'll be fine."

"Probably." Billy makes sure the ray gun's lined up reasonably well with where Captain Hammer will be sitting - Christine's already got strict instructions to take the seat facing the access door, and they tested a shot to the back, so this should work. "What, even Pepper took it badly?"

"Pepper thought I was going to stick to the cards. Can't imagine why - I figured it would save her trouble in the long run, if I just came out and said it."

"Probably true, but you might have - people coming." They close the door, and Tony lowers the visor on the armor, just in case; he'd been uncertain about hanging around for the whole thing, but Billy figures he's well overdue a good gloat - he can't waste that evil laughter coaching, after all - and he'd rather have someone who can stop Captain Hammer cold on hand, if necessary.

Billy watches through the door's small window as Christine and Captain Hammer settle in. He gives them a few moments, opens the door to take aim while Captain Hammer's talking, and fires.

They know it was a direct hit within thirty seconds, and are promptly treated to the first earth-shattering surprise of the afternoon at about the same time, when Christine asks what Captain Hammer's day job is.

"Stark Industries," he says, like he's gloating about saving people he put in danger himself. "I work down in the shop. Somebody needs some heavy lifting done, I'm there."

Christine raises an eyebrow, but that's the only sign of her surprise; she's good, Billy has to admit. He just wants to shake Captain Hammer and ask him how _stupid_ he is, that when he was handed Iron Man's secret identity on a platter he carried on working for the guy.

But that would ruin the element of surprise, and there's no point in doing that when this is working so beautifully, for once.

The revelations keep coming. The most satisfying one, for Billy, is when Captain Hammer says he picks on scientific loners because he's deeply afraid of being outsmarted - especially when the next thing out of his mouth is that he _doesn't_ give a damn about bystanders' safety, if it gives him something else to rescue them from.

Hands down, the creepiest revelation comes when Christine asks Captain Hammer for his thoughts about the upcoming presidential election.

"I'm voting Republican," he says. "Sarah Palin's hot. And I like her take on the issues, but mostly, she's hot."

Even Christine looks a little alarmed, at that one. Billy feels a little ill; his own political leanings aside, the way to vote is _definitely_ not by objectifying one of the running mates.

Christine strings Captain Hammer along for another ten or so minutes, taking his blatant passes in stride with remarkable poise. Then she closes her notebook, smiles a little, and says, "Off the record, Captain? You've been had. Big time."

Billy knows a good cue when he hears one, and it's not hard to put some heart in the evil laugh, considering things went so well. Captain Hammer's too confused to hit him, and just looks between him and Christine for a few moments.

"...Dr. Horrible? What did you do to this poor reporter?"

"Oh, I didn't do anything to _her_. I just got a little something to stick to you, for a change, and the whole world's going to know about it soon enough. And once people see what I see, I think you're going to have a very hard time saving the day."

Captain Hammer frowns. "And why would anyone take the word of a villain like yourself?"

"It's hard to argue with the truth, Captain. Besides, I won't be the one putting the word out."

Captain Hammer starts to charge toward him, but Tony's emerged from the back hallway, and and knocks him out before he can make much progress.

Christine watches Captain Hammer fall, then says, "Is he gonna be all right?"

Tony shrugs. "Apparently, he walked away ten minutes later, last time I hit him. Worst that'll happen is his ego bruises, but I don't think any of us are worried about that. Anyway, you want dinner, since you had to put up with that idiot?"

"I'm not interested in a repeat of last time we met, if that's--"

"Farthest thing from my mind, I promise."

"All right then." Christine turns to Billy before they go, and says, "It's kinda nice to know I'm not the only one who wasn't impressed by that idiot."

"No kidding. You two have fun."

"You're not coming?"

Billy shrugs. "I've got stuff to do at home. I look forward to your article."

He leaves before Tony and Christine do, after a pit stop in a bathroom to change out of the lab coat. This one's definitely worthy of a blog post, he thinks - doubly so since he actually pulled something off before talking about it.


	7. Chapter 7

It's not often Penny finds herself with a day full of nothing to do, but today is one of them. It's Sunday, so she doesn't have to go to work, and the shelter's long since said that she does enough for them during the week that if she wants to stay home on the weekends, she can. She doesn't, usually, but it's been a long-feeling week.

She watches a movie, then surfs the Internet for a while. One of the blogs she follows is talking about another blog, apparently trying to figure out how much of its content is serious business and how much is fabricated. She's never heard of it, so she follows the link to the blog in question.

It's an odd sort of revelation; she hadn't known Billy kept a video blog. But when she starts watching the videos, she gets the feeling she can guess why he hasn't mentioned it before. Penny wouldn't have thought he had a bit of evil in him, especially since he wants to make the world a better place.

She watches a few videos, and notices a subtle change of tone at about the time Billy said he got the new job. The posts get a little bit vaguer and a lot more hopeful, and there's a lot less about the Evil League of Evil.

And then she gets to the most recent post, from yesterday, where he opens up with proof that the evil laugh coaching paid off.

"That," he says, "is in honor of a little something pulled off this afternoon. When _Vanity Fair_ publishes its interview with Captain Hammer, just remember it was brought to you by Dr. Horrible, with a little help from Iron Man." Penny wonders, for a second, when Billy could have met Iron Man, and then remembers that he was still there, the day she just missed him; with the new information, she'd bet anything Billy was involved in whatever Captain Hammer was trying to stop.

"We distracted him with the reporter - who was in on this once we knew the equipment worked - and then I hit him with my Truth In Advertising Ray." He smiles a little, though the smile falters after a second or two. "Much as I'd love to call it the Veritaserum Ray, J.K. Rowling would sue the pants off of me, and I... don't have that many pants. Seems prudent to avoid that struggle--"

He's cut off by his phone ringing; he picks it up, frowns at the display, and then answers. Penny has to replay the video two or three times before she can make out the other end, but eventually she has it:

_He saw your application  
And thought it just might work.  
But now you're associatin'  
With some hero jerk!  
Unless assassination  
Is where your thoughts do lurk_

_He can't accept this change of course  
So GTFO, signed, Bad Horse!_

That's a little alarming, and for a second, Penny's afraid to watch the rest of the video. But she does turn it back on - she at least has to know how this turns out, so she knows what to say to Billy on Wednesday - and in the end, she's glad she did.

Billy - or Dr. Horrible, or whatever - turns off his phone, and sighs. "You know... that would have been a lot more upsetting this time last month, but right now I'm inclined to say Bad Horse and his singing telegram posse can stuff it. And anyway, I'm getting mixed messages here. Captain Hammer thinks Iron Man is a villain, the League and the press seem to be in agreement that he's a hero - who's right, here? Discuss. It'll give me some fun emails for next time, no doubt.

"But anyway, that's another part of why I've kept things vague lately. I didn't want word getting out before things were done, and, well. Iron Man keeps up his own PR all right, so I didn't really have to help him along. The blog is still rolling, make no mistake, but... maybe it'll be a little less villainous now. Time will tell."

The video ends; Penny just stares at the screen for a few moments, then watches it again. After a couple more viewings, she thinks she knows what to say to him. She sends him an email, since he asked for viewer commentary anyway, and says at the end that they'll talk Wednesday unless he'd rather do so sooner.

On the whole, she's rather glad Billy's moving away from the active-villainy thing. It wouldn't give him what he wants to see, most likely, and she'd hate to see his spirits crushed like that.


	8. Chapter 8

One look at Billy, on Monday morning, and Tony knows something's up. Billy's never been the most confident guy in the world, but he's twitching like there's no tomorrow, and he about jumps out of his skin when Pepper passes him in the hallway.

So Tony confronts the situation the best way he knows how - namely, he goes to Billy's office, sets a rum and Coke down on his desk, and says, "Here. You need a drink."

Billy eyes the drink, and then Tony. "You... do know alcohol doesn't solve everything, right?"

"Of course it does. Anyway, you look like you need it."

"My alcohol tolerance is crap. If I have that now, I'll be completely useless the rest of the day."

Tony sighs. "Fine, fine, have it your way. But at least tell me what's bugging you. You're a lot more wigged out than usual."

"It's... a long story."

"The girlfriend kind of long story, or another one?"

Billy turns bright red. "She's not my girlfriend. Not yet, anyway, and... I don't know if she ever _will_ be because she found my blog and she emailed me about it and I can't tell what she thinks about it and..." He trails off, flailing, but that's more than enough for Tony to go by.

"And this is a problem because it includes mention of certain activities that Captain Hammer beat you up over, am I right?"

Billy nods, staring intently at whatever schematics are in front of him.

"Thought it might." Tony picks up the rum and Coke. "Well. Have you done anything on it since I first talked to you?"

"Well, yeah. And the most objectionable part's gone down the toilet anyway. I just hope she caught that part - okay, dude, you bring me a drink and then _you_ drink it?"

"No point in letting it go to waste, if you're not going to."

Billy rolls his eyes. "Anyway - like I said, she emailed me. I just - it's hard to pick out emotions in text-based communication, so I don't know if she's actually upset."

"I'd say the fact that she emailed you at all is probably a good sign. Long as she didn't say she never wants to talk to you again, or anything."

"No, she said she'll see me Wednesday. So... that's good, I guess."

Tony shakes his head. "You and your laundromat dates, seriously. You could at least take her out to dinner."

"I'm still working on the asking part - and, you know, hoping I haven't completely screwed everything up. We can't all be you. Anyway, have you talked to Pepper yet, about the thing she missed from the ray test?"

"...That's completely different. Anyway, we were talking about you."

Billy smirks. "If you can dish it out, you can take it. And how is it completely different, aside from the fact that you've known her longer?"

"For one thing, she works for me. Second, she knows all my faults better than I do, and third, she already _said_ no, years ago."

"Did you actually ask her on a date, or just hit on her?"

Tony shrugs. "That's beside the point. She's not interested."

"...You just hit on her, then. Maybe if you tried again without your foot on the gas, you'd get somewhere - what's the worst that could happen?"

"She laughs in my face and says no."

"Exactly. I really don't think she'd quit on you." Billy makes a couple of notes on his schematics; Tony sighs, and finishes off the rum and Coke.

"Probably not. But still. I need a drink."

Billy looks up, frowning a bit. "You... just had one, unless I missed something."

"So I need another one."

"Okay, I'm pretty sure drinking that borders on problematic _would_ be a deal-breaker, from what I know of Pepper. Just something to think about."

Tony sighs. "I don't know. Anyway, you got any interesting schematics, before I leave you alone again?"

When they're done talking shop, Billy's not twitching up a storm anymore; Tony's willing to call that a victory. He still feels like he needs a drink, but he decides to try _not_ having one, and that works out all right.


	9. Chapter 9

Penny ends up counting up the signatures on the petitions, mostly because no one else wants to bother. It's tedious, but it's got to be done if they want to know whether they've got a prayer of getting that vacant building - really, they probably shouldn't have waited this long to do it. The building's still there, at least.

But the signature count she's got when she's halfway through the petitions isn't very promising. She takes what's left to the laundromat on Wednesday, but even laundry can't soften the blow of the numbers not adding up, and before she knows it she's thinking out loud about how this does not look good at all.

"Something wrong?" someone asks, from a couple chairs down. Penny looks over, an explanation half-formed in her head, and almost drops the petitions when she sees who it is.

"Oh! I'm sorry. I... hadn't realised anyone else was here." Or that the laundromat was attracting celebrities - which is silly, since even famous people need to wash their clothes, and Pepper Potts isn't famous so much as the acknowledged power behind the throne.

Or office chair, whichever.

Pepper smiles. "It's all right. You weren't bothering me, I just couldn't help overhearing, and... well, it didn't sound good."

"It really isn't. I volunteer with one of the homeless shelters in the area, and we're trying to convince the city to give us a vacant building that'd be _perfect_ for expanding a little, instead of tearing it down. But I don't think the petitions got enough signatures to pull it off."

"Oh, dear. Is there anything I could do to help?"

Penny stares; she certainly hadn't been expecting to hear that. "...I couldn't ask - I mean, I'm sure you have more than enough to keep you busy. We'd come up with something eventually."

"Mr. Stark's always saying I should do something for myself every now and then. This may not be exactly what he has in mind, but..." Pepper shrugs. "It's certainly for a good cause. Besides, I have some experience with this sort of thing, given how often I end up organising the Stark Foundation benefits."

"True. And, well, none of us are really professionals - we're just trying to do things to help people, as best we can."

They start talking about things the shelter might be able to do alongside the petitions; half an hour later, they've moved on to 'instead of the petitions' and have a benefit half planned out. They're both thinking that if the shelter can't convince the city to just donate the building, anything with Tony Stark's name attached to it could bring in more than enough money to buy the building, give the inside a full overhaul, and keep the place well-stocked for months. Penny's so caught up in the idea that she almost misses Billy's entrance entirely; she catches motion out of the corner of her eye, but doesn't process it until it stops suddenly.

She and Pepper both look up at about the same time, but Pepper's the first to comment. "Hi, Billy."

"...Hi. What are you doing _here_?"

"Washing machine at my apartment broke. Kind of frustrating, but what can you do?" One of the dryers buzzes; Pepper eyes the bank of dryers for a moment. "I think that might have been mine. Penny, I'll keep you posted - I think we've got a solid plan here. It was nice meeting you."

"You too." Penny smiles. "And thank you for your help."

"Of course." Pepper gets up and heads for the dryers; Billy finishes loading a washer, then takes her vacated seat.

"So what were you two planning? Should I ask?"

"Just stuff for the shelter. It... looks like you were probably right, about the signatures thing, but she thinks if she pitches it right, she can talk her boss into having a benefit that'll help us buy the building and fix it up."

"Hmm, Tony Stark throw a party... it'll never happen." Billy smiles. "Seriously, though, good for you. I think he'll go for it - good PR for supporting a good cause."

"I hope so." She hesitates for a moment, then decides she'd better plow ahead anyway, just so they're both clear on where they stand. "So. About your blog."

"...I should have known I wouldn't get out of talking about that."

"Yeah. I... singing telegram posse? Seriously?"

Billy shrugs. "Don't look at me. They're not _my_ henchmen."

"I know, but - that was completely ridiculous. Seriously, why did you even consider listening to those guys?"

"I... the world is a _mess_. I think I can fix some of that, if I have a chance. And, well. First time I had a good look around, I decided the last thing I wanted to be was Captain Hammer."

Penny considers that for a moment. "I can't say I blame you there, or for wanting to fix the world. But I really don't think Bad Horse is aiming to improve things. It's not what you'd call a typical evil motive."

"Yeah, I've - I'm letting that drop, I think. If anything, Tony's a good example of now not to be a hero _or_ a villain and still get something done that the world will notice."

"He would be - wait, so he is...?"

"Of course he is," Billy says, like he's stating the obvious. "This is the guy who did showy missile demonstrations in the middle of the desert. He's not gonna say he's got this great new toy and then turn around and say that was a joke."

"I guess you have a point there. He is kind of... flashy. Do you know what you're going to do with the blog?"

"I haven't entirely decided. I don't want to close it - if nothing else, Dr. Horrible's good for stress relief - but... I don't know how often I'll have stuff to put on it. As interesting as I've had in the past, anyway."

"Well." Penny's washer goes off; she gets up and starts loading her clothes into her basket. "You could always make up a plot as you go along. I found it through people trying to figure out if you were being serious or not, so you could probably keep up the feel of it."

"Huh. Probably."

They talk about other stuff, after Penny loads her things into the dryer - she's satisfied with his answers, so she's willing to let him change the subject. The big surprise, though, comes when she's got her stuff out of the dryer and is about to go.

"Um." Billy stops, looking even more nervous than he had when she brought up the blog. "I - do you... would you like to go out for dinner, sometime?"

It's a surprise, that he's asking, but Penny thinks it's a good kind of surprise. "Sure. I'd love to."

Billy grins. "Great! Um. How's Friday?"

"Fridays aren't the best - I usually help with dinner at the shelter. How about after laundry on Saturday?"

"Sounds good. I'll... see you then."

Penny's still smiling, when she gets home.


	10. Chapter 10

The next morning, Pepper goes over to Tony's house. There's no girl to chase out, at least so far as she's aware, but there _are_ a number of papers that need his attention, and the easiest way she's found to get that attention is to catch him before he goes to the office. It takes her out of competition with the engineers and shop supervisors and occasional visits from Colonel Rhodes.

He's in the garage, to her complete lack of surprise, taking stock of the car he landed on while testing the suit; when she steps in, Jarvis is halfway through noting that it might be easier to replace the car than attempt to repair it.

"Yeah, yeah," Tony replies, "but you don't just find cars like this every day. Besides, if I do that, I'd probably try to sell this one, and I don't want to have to explain what happened to it."

_"If you found the right scrap heap, sir, they would not ask you to explain it. And while it is true that the car itself is rare, I have no doubt you could hunt one down eventually. Good morning, Miss Potts."_

"Hello, Jarvis." The whole talking-computer thing's taken a while to get used to, but Jarvis has his uses; if he hadn't addressed her directly, it's likely Pepper could have waited until Tony was about to leave before she had his attention. "Mr. Stark, there's some paperwork that needs your attention."

"All right, hit me. Not literally, of course."

"Of course. That house in Denver sent a counter-offer - are you still interested?"

Tony nods. "Let me see what they've got."

Pepper hands the paperwork over, pleased to see that Tony actually reads the whole thing before signing off and handing it back to her. Clearly, her April Fools' prank of a few years ago where she told him he'd signed her resignation left an impression. "All right. GE wants more details about the energy thing you sent them--"

"I don't have those yet. They're just going to have to wait."

"Well, from the looks of this, they're starting to get impatient. You might want to throw them a bone."

Tony shrugs. "We're working on it. They'll get something soon enough. Next?"

"The Calder piece has another offer. Yes, no, maybe?"

"It a nice painting?"

Pepper sighs. "It's one of his mobiles, sir. Remember, you said you wanted something other than a piano for that empty space upstairs?"

"Oh, right. That thing. Yeah, let's go for that. Anything else?"

"One more thing, actually. What would you say to a benefit next weekend?"

Tony looks at her like she's grown another head. "Don't you usually say you need at least a month to get those things set up?"

"Yes, but this is a special circumstance, and if we don't move quickly, it may not do much good. I talked to someone who volunteers with a homeless shelter yesterday, while I was taking care of my laundry, and she said they're trying to expand their base of operations. Without some quick action, the building they're after will probably be a parking lot this time next month."

Pepper can't quite believe she's offering to throw a major function together this quickly, either, but Penny said she'd be more than willing to help pick up the work, and that she could probably talk a few of the other volunteers into pitching in.

"Ah. Help a good cause, get Stark some good PR, everybody wins?"

"Exactly."

"All right then. Sounds good. Want to actually show up as a couple?"

Pepper drops the papers.

"You dropped something," Tony says; the tone of his voice doesn't give away that he asked her anything out of the ordinary, but she glances at his face before starting to pick everything up.

He's actually worried about her reaction. Not that she can blame him, considering how he started off last time he... expressed an interest, but it's still weird; Tony Stark does _not_ worry about women.

"You don't... mean that as anything else."

"No. Just me showing up with a date. That's probably enough to shock the press anyway."

Pepper sighs. "Half of the tabloids seem to think we're an item as it is."

"I know. But... do you want to?"

"Promise you won't leave me on the roof again?"

"Swear to God," Tony says, holding his hands up in a classic surrender gesture. "Didn't mean to do it last time, but - we already discussed that. And, well, if I go in with a date, I won't be leaving with a different one."

"Good to know. I... all right. I'll go with you. Will that be all, Mr. Stark?"

"That will be all, Miss Potts."

"You have a meeting at eleven. I'd recommend you shower before coming to the office." With that, Pepper heads upstairs and out of the house, planning to stop by the post office and get the house and art paperwork in the mail.

She passes the shelter's current building, quite by accident - and then she starts to smile.


	11. Chapter 11

In contrast to Billy's last two weeks in tech support, the week and a bit before the shelter benefit absolutely flies by. But that makes a certain amount of sense, when he thinks about it; there's a hell of a lot going on, and none of it's boring.

Penny ropes him into helping get things organised for the benefit, when they're waiting on their laundry. He doesn't mind, though - it's a good cause to stuff envelopes for, even if it _is_ just treating a symptom of the overall problem. One of the things that's been sinking in, lately, is that it's hard to cure the disease when the symptoms are pervasive, especially in a case like this.

Their dinner out is... actually a lot better than he'd thought it might be. He manages to not flail the entire time, and as far as he can tell, Penny enjoys herself. When they get to their cars, she stops him, blushing as much as he's sure he was when he asked her out.

"For the benefit," she says, "I was wondering... you don't have to show up at the same _time_ I do, since I'll probably be there all afternoon, but we could hang out once it's underway, or something?"

"You - like a date? Really?"

"Yeah. If you want, anyway."

Billy grins. "I'd love to." He'd been trying to work up the nerve to ask her, as soon as he heard the benefit was in the works, but Penny asking not only saves him the trouble but proves he's got a chance.

Sunday, Dr. Horrible does a blog post, as much to let the world know he's still alive as anything else. He's a little surprised that the League hasn't done anything about him letting the application drop, but he's certainly not going to say as much; no skin off his back if they leave him be. He reads a few of the emails that have come in on the Iron Man question and throws in some comments of his own.

Moist comes in a few minutes after he turns off the webcam. After they talk for a few minutes, it's clear that Moist is a bit more cagey than usual; Billy's usually bad at spotting that sort of thing, but the puddle on the floor helps.

"Okay, what's bugging you?"

"It's just..." Moist shrugs. "Are you sure about dropping the League all of a sudden, Doc? I mean, they're not exactly forgiving when people let an application drop like that."

"Things are changing. New opportunities opening up, and all that. They haven't given me any trouble yet, and if they do, I think I'll be able to handle it."

"Well, if you're sure." Moist hangs around a little bit longer, then drips off to parts unknown, almost frying a surge protector by accident on his way out.

Monday, Tony has a prototype demonstration of a new mine-detection robot, steered by a smaller version of Billy's van-steering remote; it's amazing, what access to top-quality materials will do for maximum efficiency in minimum space. Wednesday, _Popular Science_ calls Billy and asks if they can interview him about the steering mechanism.

He's more than a little stunned - if anything, he would have thought the robot was the more interesting part of the design, not how it's controlled. But he's not going to argue with the infinite wisdom of the science-periodical community, if they think his part of the invention deserves a little publicity.

Thursday, word gets around Dr. Horrible's circle of - well, the only one who's ever actually been a _friend_ is Moist, so associates - that Bad Horse had a racing accident. Apparently, that meant what it usually does for horses, which is a little weird - but then again, maybe the terrible death whinny was easier to come by than super-...equine invulnerability.

Anyway, the upshot of that is, there's an Evil League of Evil bylaw that states that any applications in process at the time of the head's death have to be resubmitted, no matter how far along they are. Billy figures that's probably why no one's come after his head, yet, and that he'll probably be fine if he just lets his application lapse. It's definitely bound to be better for his long-term health than re-applying would be, since he's got no doubt at all that the rest of the League's heard about the Iron Man thing.

Friday, Tony and Billy find themselves presented with advance copies of next month's _Vanity Fair_. The Captain Hammer interview isn't the cover story, as such; it's mentioned _on_ the cover, but the picture's of another interviewee entirely.

Billy saves it for his lunch break. There's no mention of the setup, but that's all right. The people who follow his blog will know what got Captain Hammer to speak his mind, and for anyone else... well, hopefully the supposed hero's own words will do the trick.


	12. Chapter 12

Penny does, in fact, end up spending all of Saturday afternoon helping set up the benefit. One of the older volunteers, who heard she'd acquired a date for the occasion, shoos her home around five so that she has time to get ready. Not that she's got anything new for the occasion - she doesn't have that kind of budget - but Maureen's got a good point; there's not much use in having the date if she _looks_ like she's been busy all day.

Penny doubts Billy would actually mind, but she also doesn't want to look completely out of place. There are bound to be some pretty important people there; last minute or not, it is a Tony Stark party, after all. She digs a suitable dress out of her closet, showers, does some light makeup, and heads back.

She does her best not to focus on the people who are mostly there to be important at each other, instead watching the people who came because they saw a flyer, and the handful of people living in the shelter that could fit into the donated formal wear that turned up. She and Pepper came up with a two-tier donation arrangement, so that people who wanted to pitch in but can't afford the usual extravagant price tag could still make a contribution. From the looks of things, the shelter's going to come out of this very well off indeed.

Billy shows up about half an hour after Penny gets back, and almost walks right past her. She does catch his attention before he misses her completely, but then all he can do is stare, which isn't terribly comforting.

"Is... something wrong?" She hasn't had this dress out in a while; it's entirely possible there's some kind of rip or stain on it that she's forgotten about.

Billy shakes his head, rather emphatically. "No. No, not at all, you... you look good. Really good."

"Oh." Penny smiles, feeling her cheeks heat up a bit. "Thanks. So do you."

Billy goes bright red, but he's smiling.

They spend most of the night sitting at a table, talking about pretty much anything that comes to mind. Tony and Pepper's entrance is hard to miss, in part because it leaves Billy grinning fit to beat the band.

"He actually asked her," he says. "_Yes_."

"You think so?"

"Pepper cares a lot about image - I don't think she would have shown up _with_ him if they hadn't talked about it beforehand. And... well, from the sound of things, it's been a long time coming."

Penny smiles. "She looks happy."

Their conversation meanders on from there, touching on everything from cheesy horror movies to various magazine interviews. Penny still isn't sure what to make of the _Vanity Fair_ thing - on the one hand, it sounds a little excessive, but on the other, it didn't actually hurt anyone - but she's pleased to hear about _Popular Science_ wanting to talk to Billy.

"Speaking of thrilling heroics," he says, after a brief lull in the conversation. "Or... thrilling non-heroics, actually. I don't think I'm going to have to worry about the League anymore."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. Bad Horse had a racing accident, and they've got a bylaw about re-submitting applications when leadership turns over, so I'm just going to let it lapse."

"A racing accident?" Penny can't help but laugh, a little; it just sounds so patently ridiculous.

Billy grins. "Well, what else do you expect from the Thoroughbred of Sin? Apparently he caught a puddle on the track at the wrong moment, and..." He stops, frowning. "Wait a second. When's the last time it rained?"

"A couple weeks ago, I think. And... I don't remember it being hard enough to leave that long-lasting of a puddle."

"...Oh, for the love of God." Billy facepalms. "I don't believe it - _wow_."

Penny frowns a bit. "What's wrong?"

"I don't know if anything's wrong, as such. I'll have to ask around before I can say for sure, but - that accident may not have been very accidental after all. If I'm right, I should still be okay, but... yeah."

"Well... I hope you're not in trouble anyway. That would be unfortunate."

"Yeah." Billy smiles, turning a bit pink again. "I... actually like where I've ended up."

"Which is always a good thing." Penny watches the party for a few moments. "We should... dance or something."

"Um. All right. I warn you, I'm not very good at it."

"That's all right." She stands, takes Billy's hand, and heads for the dance floor. He's actually better than he let on, so she thinks the issue might be that he's not used to dancing with someone else.

She thinks that she wouldn't mind helping him adjust.


	13. Chapter 13

Moist proves unexpectedly difficult to track down, which isn't helping dissuade Billy of his idea that - well, he at least knows something about what happened. If he didn't need to know what happened, for his own peace of mind as much as anything else, he'd back off; it's not a good idea to corner Moist when he's twitchy, unless he's at the top of a hill or something. But it's kind of necessary that he find out what's going on, so Billy keeps trying.

It pays off two days later; he picks up the soggy trail after work and catches Moist at a fast-food place.

"Hey," he says. "Been looking for you."

Moist doesn't meet his eyes. "Don't know why you'd be doing that."

"I think you do. But I also think this isn't the best place to talk about it. Come over, when you're done?"

Moist nods, and Billy heads home, partly satisfied. It's so long before Moist gets there that he starts to wonder if something happened to him, but he does show up eventually.

"Sorry about that. Wanted to make sure no one was... well, you know."

Billy nods. "I understand. It's... I have to ask. Was the convenient puddle you?"

"...I'd hoped that part hadn't gotten out. Don't tell anyone, please, I don't want the attention."

"Why not? Most people, if they offed the head of the Evil League of Evil, would want the world to know they were responsible." Heroes have an obnoxious habit of making sure the world knows it's a safer place, and other villains would at _least_ be trying to get a foot in the League's door, if not claim to be the rightful successor.

"I'm not most people." Moist shrugs, and starts dripping a little more. "I don't want or need the League's kind of excitement in my life - I already dehydrate myself on practically a daily basis. It's better if this stays a racing accident."

"Then why did you do it?"

"It's... you're going places, Doc. You always _have_ been. You found another way to get where you're going - even if you don't take over the world, you're definitely gonna change it, and that's what you want. I didn't want to see you lose the chance just because the League got pissy, and from the rumor mill at the Henchman's Union, Bad Horse was well on his way there. I can't promise you'll never be a target of theirs again, but you'll at least be able to get something done first."

That stops Billy for a moment. "...Wouldn't have asked you to go to that kind of trouble, if I'd known you were thinking of it."

"I know."

"Still, though. You could milk this for anything you _wanted_."

Moist shrugs again. "I'm a bit player. I'm the minor leagues. The best I can really hope for is someone calling me 'Kemo-soggy,' or something - and I'm fine with that. Better for my long-term health, for one thing." He smiles a little. "You're going on to greater things. Seemed to me like you could use a clean break."

"That wasn't someone snapping my neck, right?"

"Pretty much."

"Fair enough." Billy grins. "See, I knew there was more to you than just a human humidifier."

"Yeah, yeah. I just hope I don't creep everyone else out. Hey, I meant to ask last week - how'd your date go?"

"...A lot better than I thought it would. And technically, we're up to two, after the benefit thing. I think it's... not entirely hopeless." Billy thinks better of it than that, actually, but at the same time, he's trying not to get his hopes up too far. Just in case he's wrong.

"Good for you, man. I'd better go - meeting tonight. One of the ones where they collect dues. I can't tell you how _glad_ I am there are dollar coins in circulation again."

Billy laughs. "I can imagine. I'll see you around, right?"

"Probably. Good luck, Doc."

"Thanks. I think I'm gonna need it."

He waits until Moist is gone before he cracks up.


	14. Chapter 14

By Thursday, the donations from the benefit are tallied and ready to be handed over. Pepper makes a point of taking the check down herself, rather than leaving it to someone else; she thinks in a case like this, the personal delivery is just as important as having the function itself.

That and she wants to see the look on Penny's face, when she sees how well the benefit did.

She parks down the street from the shelter, and walks down; fortunately, Penny's in the lobby, which saves a little time.

"Oh! Hi, Pepper. What brings you down here?"

Pepper smiles. "The donations are officially yours. Thought you guys might like to have it."

"That would be more help than you guys keeping it, definitely. How'd we do?"

Rather than answering, Pepper just hands over the check. Penny's eyes widen, when she gets her first look at it.

"Are you sure there are supposed to be that many zeroes on this?"

"There are. I think a couple of the regular contributors chipped in a little more than usual, and there were dozens of smaller donations. It all adds up, after a while."

"I guess so." Penny smiles. "Thank you. This is... really, really good. And probably more persuasive than a petition would be."

"Money is strange like that. Did everyone here have fun?"

"I've heard nothing but good stories. What about you and Tony?"

Pepper blushes, much to her chagrin. "It's... complicated."

"Whether you enjoyed yourselves on Saturday can't be _that_ complicated."

"Well, no. That part isn't. It was... nice. I'm just not sure what to do with him asking _me_, of all people, and not insisting on anything else from the night."

Penny raises an eyebrow. "You're not going to protest that much if a guy decides not to put the moves on you, are you?"

"Not at all. It's a bit unusual for Tony, is all."

"I'll give you that one. Maybe he thinks you're worth the extra effort."

Pepper shrugs. "His methodology's improved since the first time he asked, I'll give him that. Then again, I think he knows if he stuck with his original approach, it would get him less than nowhere."

"Let me guess, he tried just hitting on you. And learned very quickly that that wouldn't work, or you wouldn't have agreed to work for him." Penny disappears from view behind a counter, presumably to put the check in a safe for the time being. "What do you think of him now?"

"...It's complicated." Pepper knows she's already said that, but there's nothing else that suits, really. "I know him better than anyone, in my life _or_ his. That doesn't really make for much to recommend him. But... he's changed some, since Afghanistan." She means that in more ways than the part where he built a flying suit of armor and started hunting down terrorists who were stashing his weapons, but this isn't really the place to mention it.

Fortunately, Penny seems to pick up on the subtlety of that point. "The tabloids have certainly had a lot less to say about him since then. It's more the mainstream press that's had the field days."

"No kidding. Colonel Rhodes had to sit him down and explain exactly why the best arms manufacturer in the country suddenly refusing to supply the military would be a very bad idea. I'm just glad he tackled that one - I needed the break."

"I had wondered what happened with that one." Penny glances at a clock, and adds, "I should let you get back to your other stuff. And probably head to the bank. I just hope they heard we had a benefit at all, or they're never going to believe this number."

Pepper laughs. "If they give you any trouble, call me. I should be able to set them straight."


	15. Chapter 15

Penny happens to mention, in the course of usual laundromat conversation, that she's got an idea for the blog; she won't elaborate, other than saying she'd need to be there for it. Billy figures she wants to put in some kind of appearance, but stops pressing for details when that doesn't work, and suggests they do... whatever it is on Saturday, after they're done with that day's laundry. She agrees, and shows up on Saturday with an extra duffel bag.

"So what's in the bag?"

Penny smiles. "You'll see later."

"Can't you at least give me some warning for what you've got in mind?"

"Oh, come on. What would be the fun in that?"

Billy can't deny that point, so he lets the matter drop, and they pass the time waiting for their clothes talking about everything under the sun. Well, everything _else_ under the sun. When they're both done, they head over to Billy's apartment complex.

"Okay," Penny says. "I need to stop by the bathroom - which way's your apartment?"

"...Down the hall ten doors, on the left. But I've got a bathroom, it's probably cleaner than the lobby--"

"It's a plot point, Billy. No fun in not having a dramatic entrance."

Billy grins. "Well, I can't really argue that. Should I go ahead and get started when I get down there, then?"

"Yeah. I'll be there in a few." She disappears into the bathroom, and Billy heads down the hall. Once he gets to his apartment, he dumps his laundry basket in his bedroom, gets out the lab coat and goggles, prints out a few emails, and starts up the webcam.

"As a matter of interest," he says, "_Vanity Fair_'s Captain Hammer interview is in next month's issue. Keep an eye on the newsstands, if you don't already have it. Hope you all enjoy the results of my handiwork. I know I did."

He smirks a little, then moves on to the emails. There are a couple addressing the Iron Man question, and one asking for Dr. Horrible's opinion about Bad Horse's racing accident (which Billy mostly printed out for the challenge of keeping how much he knows out of the equation). The last straw, though, is yet another gem from Johnny Snow; he doesn't even read past the 'from:' line on that one.

"You are _still not my nemesis_, man. And really, if you're calling yourself a good guy, you might want to find a nemesis who's not leaning more toward chaotic neutral. It just looks bad to go--"

He's interrupted mid-rant by a knock on the door, which at least means he doesn't have to feign annoyance. "What is it? I'm a little busy right now."

"I'm sure it's nothing that can't wait, Doctor," Penny's voice calls.

Even though he knew this was coming, she kept him enough in the dark that it doesn't take _too_ much acting. He raises an eyebrow, and calls back, "And why should it wait?"

"Because I did say I'd be back if you gave up on the League. And since you've done that, we've got a bit of catching up to do. Now, are you going to let me in, or do I have to take matters into my own hands?"

Billy doesn't trust himself to say anything in response, still wondering just what kind of plot Penny's got in her head. He gets up without turning off the webcam, and opens the door.

He doesn't know where she found the mask, but it goes a long way toward dressing up the dark green blouse and jeans - not to mention, it's a little more effective than the goggles, even only covering the top of her face. She also looks a little more sure of herself, though that could just be his imagination.

When he finally finds his voice, it's actually more Dr. Horrible's voice. "Well. This _is_ a surprise."

"I would hope so. If you knew I was coming, that would mean I was losing my touch." She steps in, sets her duffel bag down just inside the door - and then kisses him.

He definitely wasn't expecting that, but he does recover enough to kiss her back before she pulls away. When she does, he says, "Just a sec, I need to--" He waves a hand at the computer.

Penny smiles. "Go ahead."

Billy goes over to the computer and eyes the camera for a moment. "I don't know how much the camera caught," he says, "but the short version is, you'll have to get the proper introduction next time. Later." He shuts off the webcam, and then lets the shit-eating grin take over his face like it wants to.

"You... didn't mind?" Penny says, looking a little nervous.

"God, no. Not at all. I just... had no idea what you had in mind. It works, though. It works really well."

"Thanks."

"So, um." Billy looks down at his hands for a moment, though he's pretty sure he won't stop grinning for quite some time. "You have an alias in mind yet?"

"I'm still thinking about it. I'll make sure you know before you post again. Just... thought you could use a little plot, since your focus is officially changing. I mean, I did want to kiss you anyway--"

"No, it's okay, I got that part. Really don't think you would have done it like that if you didn't mean it."

Penny blushes, but she's smiling too. "Well, no."

"Oh, um. Update on the Bad Horse thing." He'd wanted to mention it Wednesday, but the laundromat didn't seem like the place to say anything, and when Penny mentioned wanting to do something with the blog, he decided to wait. "Turns out my hunch was right, which... means I don't have to worry, at least for now. He couldn't promise the League will never take an interest again, but."

Penny's smile grows. "Good. Want to get dinner to celebrate?"

"I'd like that. I'd... like that a lot."

"All right. Let's not go out dressed like this, though."

Billy can't help laughing at that; nor can he help thinking, as they head in separate directions long enough to change clothes, that this just might be the beginning of something very good indeed.


End file.
